i have alot to "get out"
i think the easiest way is to just throw it up ;)

my husbands car died the day we returned from vacation
a family of 7 with one car and MANY appointments is...tricky
i have sold all of my gold jewelry and we took our van to the scrap yard to collect cash for another car
its not enough to purchase one that runs
still waiting for God to provide *not always patiently*
caleb has trouble running outside and being able to breathe
that's a problem when you play football
been to an allergist...several times in the past 2 weeks
still working on getting it under control
the work on our home *started in March* is STILL not done
grace was diagnosed with a seizure disorder and started on meds
she had a huge one the week before vacation, it felt like she was dying
i'm tired of seeing my children look so vulnerable and life-less
it's odd to think some parents will NEVER witness these moments
i've been a mother for 15.5 years...this week i made my first trip to the ER for stitches
i'm WAY behind on scheduling appointments for my little ones with specialists out of town
*like by 6-8 months*
we took noah off of medication he has been on and in 2.5 mo he's gained 20lb and grew 1.5 in
i have exposed my breasts to medical professionals more times than i can count at this point
i have been fondled, poked, and prodded
i have been radiated, x-rayed, and magnetized
the breast that i have a "lump" in has been cleared
the other breast...lump free...has a large, suspicious mass in it
i saw it...glaring and huge...on the MRI & ultrasound
decisions need to be made
i'm not sleeping well
i don't like knowing it's in there...unwelcome
my head is desperate to control the things i can at this point
like EVERYTHING i can
this is not good
i feel frustrated by my humanity right now...which might sound strange or annoying to you
i have been reminded, once again, to never think i know what i would do in someone else's shoes
God is faithful
i feel loved and supported